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PRESS & DAKOTAN n MONDAY, JUNE 24, 2013
PAGE 5B
Rite Of Passage
All couples and families
pass through predictable
developmental
portals.
However, every couple and
family encounters these passages as first time events.
These transitions are indeed
rites of passage which we
expected to be joyful and
predictable, but sometimes
are neither. Marriage and
family life is really about riding the waves of life; the
crests as well as the troughs,
which include memorable
peak experiences and discouraging losses or challenges, both of which can
appear within the span of a
single day or week.
Some of these first rites of
passage occur as we prepare
to launch our kids from the
nest or when we retire. We
look forward to these passages with expectancy but
are often surprised to discover that once the kids are
gone we have to take out the
garbage. After retirement
we may have our first experience turning grey; our
first experience seeing ourselves disappear from the
conversation. Then, as often
as not, our adult children
may require more rather
than less from us, but since
they are overloaded with
parenting and work, our
help must be delivered in the
background of their busy
lives. Although none of
these things are new, the
complexities and demands of
transitioning to an empty
nest, caring for aged parents,
being good sheppard s of our
own marriage, or moving
gracefully from parenting to
sage grand parenting require
accommodations we don t
expect and may not be prepared to make.
Everyone rides the wave of
life, no one escapes; life
washes over everyone. If
we re lucky enough to be
together for twenty-five or
fifty years we will be both
the recipient and provider of
care. When these things
happen it s never convenient
and we may not feel
equipped or prepared to do
it. Although our lives have
been defined by our caretaking tasks, we may think
we re not emotionally or
physically
ready.
Nonetheless, we will transition to the other side; what is
unknown is whether we will
make the transition with joy
and grace or whether we will
be miserable.
We will all have pain at
some point, but misery, is to
a large extent, optional.
Nonetheless, we are not
required to make these transitions in silence or alone.
Although we re seasoned
helpers, when we re expecting to see the crest of a wave
and trough appears it can
discourage and isolate us.
It s often in these moments
we must recognize that the
crests are formed in the
troughs of our caretaking
opportunities. The journey
out of misery flows through
our commitments and connections to others.
Stronghold
Counseling
Services in Yankton is
anchored in a spiritual and
therapeutic approach to
these rites of passage. We
believe that hope must be
actionable, purposeful and
future and solution focused.
Solace and joy flow from
expectancy, plans, and
actions for tomorrow.
n Editorial provided by
Strong Hold Counseling
comfort love respect
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Guiding and serving families with compassion and trust.
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Memorial Resource Center, Tyndall
Memorial Chapels, Tyndall, Tabor & Menno
665-9679 1-800-495-9679
www.opsahl-kostelfuneralhome.com
Coping with a serious or lifelimiting illness is not easy.
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Yankton, SD
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